It’s had its ups and downs, but overall, it has been a downer. I received a phone call one week ago that someone very dear to me had been involved in a really bad car accident and let me just tell you that you really don’t know what powerless feels like until someone you love is struggling over 500 miles from where you are and you can’t do anything about it. The good news, if there is to be any, is that the situation is no longer critical. It will just be a long recovery process and I am missing out on chances to give assistance, words of encouragement, and big hugs where they may be needed. In addition to this, several minor things went wrong when I felt they were going pretty well and I don’t quite understand what my err was for any of them or how to repair them and my life is in a bit of a shambles currently. School was especially difficult and I slept, if I had to guess, a combined total of seven hours this week. While there was some definite good things that happened this week, the bad was especially unforgiving.
As I’ve stated before, when things are really hard for me, I turn to my favorite sources of media. I’ve spent way too much time in my dorm room this week and in order to avoid lying in bed moping the entire time, I’ve tried to distract myself with a few things.
It’s not often that I get to watch movies as homework, but because I have chosen to write a research paper on the brilliance of Guillermo del Toro, I was able to watch Pan’s Labyrinth last night and file it under “Not a Waste of Time.” I fell in love with it. It is typical Guillermo del Toro, but times ten because it features monsters with eyes in their hands and larger-than-life story telling. The ending actually made me cry. I got to see a fairy and someone get their skull bashed in with a bottle within the SAME MOVIE. I still have to write the actual paper on it, but I think it will be fairly easy as I have many thoughts on symbolism in that movie. If you have seen this wonderful film, I’d love to discuss it.
Gamma Phi does it Beta
As some of you may know, I recently joined Gamma Phi Beta. I am loving every minute of it and cannot wait to be initiated so I can officially call these wonderful women my “sisters.” An amazing Gamma Phi in particular has been one of my favorite actresses since I was little: Kristin Chenoweth. What an honor it will be to call this phenomenal woman my sister. She has played an integral part in my coping this week. Her wide range of work was able to both make me laugh and cry, which is perfect for someone who needed an emotional cleanse.
I’ve set the featured image for this post as “Excelsior” because it means onward and upward and that’s where my focus needs to be placed. I’ve had a lousy week. It had some definite highlights, but we often choose to dwell on the low ones and they have gotten the best of me this week. I am tired. I am worn. I have to fight. I have to learn to accept the fact that, even when I really really want them to work out, things will sometimes fall apart without my knowing how or why. I cannot dwell. I need to get up, dust my knees off, and get back to work.
I didn’t post about my bum week in hopes to elicit your sympathy. I hope you all have had a great week. I rather wanted to make this a testament to the healing powers media has for me. I can escape my world and enter the world of these performances or movies and forget for awhile, but I cannot do this forever and the time has come to close the door on this one bad week and remember the countless wonderful ones I’ve had to this point. Onward and upward. Always onward and upward. Excelsior!
On a side note, if you are praying people, keep my family in your thoughts please! As I said, thankfully the situation is no longer critical, but warm thoughts and good vibes being sent our way is never a bad thing!